From hiding to being seen

Unveiling

A strong feeling that arose during the Shiva of my mother led me to understand that I had been hiding enough. A shy, introverted girl, who has built up an armor to protect herself from life, instead of living it. The upheaval I experienced when my mother moved between worlds, deepened in me the desire to fulfill myself.

Inspiration

"I want to be her." This is the feeling that arose in me throughout my life when I met with women who deal with healing, and emotional, physical, and spiritual therapy. Just like them, I wanted to be able to enact the magic of therapy. I studied but had not felt ready to approach the holy of holies, touching the innermost of people’s heart. That is why my studies are not done.

A creative concession

A disappointment due to an encounter with a charlatan set me on a wonderful and thorough path of in-depth studies in the world of anthropopathic psychotherapy. There I also met the healing art and the mandalas. I arrived at a one-day workshop carrying my old armor of antipathy and was eventually asked to paint a mandala. I didn't get any directions. I never drew mandalas or was drawn to their world. A sheet of dark paper was served, with a silver circle painted on it and lots of special markers that I was not familiar with yet. A bell rang, calling participants to settle into a circle to sum up the day. But I could not part from the colors, the movement, and the joy of painting. Something happened there. The armor collapsed. From that day on, the mandalas stemmed from me in an uninhibited flow. One by one, any time my hands are not busy, I drew. I got the markers straight from Tokyo, and the mandalas I got from the sky.

Internal authority

As the year of mourning over my mother’s death passed, I decided to start spreading mandalas everywhere. They have a beauty that translates into a sense of harmony and inner peace. I recognized that the world is asking for them and that I have a strong desire to give. Finally, a sense of readiness. At Hanukkah, the mandalas bounce on dreidels, they find themselves on ceramic tiles and greeting cards, and recently I started painting mandala-inspired pictures on leaves.

Always a student

I continue to study and at the same time begin to practice therapy. I understand that this is my time to give to the world, and that there is always something new to learn.

5/7/2021